A babysitter for a wedding or party comes in two versions: at your home while you are away, which qualifies for RUT (the Swedish 50 per cent tax deduction for household services) and costs 199 kr an hour for occasional bookings, or on site at the venue, which does not qualify for RUT because the work is not done in your home. Book as soon as you know the date, and let the nanny meet the children at least once beforehand.
A wedding in the Stockholm archipelago on a Saturday in August. The ceremony at two, dinner at six, the last boat at eleven. You have a two-year-old and a five-year-old, and the invitation says clearly that children are welcome at the ceremony but that dinner is for adults. It is a common situation, and it has several solutions. Here is how to choose, and what applies regarding RUT, number of children and timings.
At home or on site?
The first decision is where the children will be. At home means a familiar environment, their own beds and an evening like any other. On site means the children can join in for the ceremony and the cake, and are then handed over to the nanny in another room or at the hotel. Both work. The difference lies in cost, logistics and how your children usually cope with new surroundings.
| Nanny at your home | Nanny on site at the venue | |
|---|---|---|
| RUT deduction | Yes, 50 per cent. The work is done in your home | No. The work is not done in or near your home |
| Price, occasional booking | 199 kr/hour after RUT | 398 kr/hour, no deduction |
| The children's evening | Usual routines, their own beds | New surroundings, late bedtime, often exciting and often messy |
| Logistics | You travel on your own, the nanny comes to your home | The nanny travels with you or meets you there, and you need a separate room |
| Best for | Children under four, long parties, parties far away | Children over four, parties where the children are meant to join in for part of the time |
| You can take part | All evening | All evening, but you are welcome to check in on the children |
The RUT rule is not ours, it is Skatteverket's (the Swedish Tax Agency): childcare qualifies for the deduction when it is carried out in or close to the home. A venue in Djursholm or a hotel on Skeppsholmen is not your home. It is easy to miss, and it doubles the price. If you want the nanny on site, that is entirely possible, but expect to pay the full price.
How many children per nanny?
It is the most common question before a wedding, and the answer depends on age more than on numbers. One nanny can look after three children between three and seven in a room with things to do. She cannot look after three babies. These are the rules of thumb we use:
- Babies under one: one nanny per baby, or one nanny for a baby and an older sibling.
- One to three years: at most two children per nanny. Two two-year-olds who do not know each other is a full-time job.
- Three to six years: three to four children per nanny if they have their own room and something to do.
- School-age children: five to six children per nanny can work, if there is a room, a film, games and food.
- Mixed ages: count based on the youngest. A baby in the group makes everything else secondary.
If there are ten children at the wedding, you need at least three nannies and a set-up where someone is in charge: a room, a time when the children are handed over, a list of which parents belong to which child. We help you plan it, but the couple or the wedding planner needs to set the framework.
Sharing a nanny with another family
The smartest set-up for many is for two families who live near each other to put the children in the same flat. One nanny, four children between three and six, one cost shared. The children should have met beforehand, and one of the families is the customer on the invoice. RUT still applies, because the care takes place in one of the families' homes. One child and two children cost the same with us, and from the third child there is an extra 20 kr an hour per child.
How to prepare the evening
- Book early. Saturdays in June and August go first. If you know the date in February, book in February.
- A meeting beforehand. The nanny comes to your home for an hour a few weeks before, meets the children and sees how you live. It is free of charge, and it is the difference between a calm evening and an evening of phone calls.
- Keep the children's evening as normal. If the children are at home, they should eat, bathe and sleep like any other Saturday. If they are on site, decide on a time when they are handed to the nanny, before they are completely worn out.
- Write the note. Your numbers, the venue's address, another adult to call if you do not answer, the bedtime routine, what the child usually wants if they wake up.
- Decide when you will be home. Give a time, and say if it changes. The nanny plans around it.
A party at your home
If you are hosting a party at home yourselves, a fortieth birthday or a christening, the nanny can take the children into another room, or out to the playground if it is daytime. That qualifies for RUT, because it is your home. What works best is to have a room that belongs to the children that evening, with food, something to do and the nanny as the base. The children will turn up for the cake anyway. That is part of the party.
How we do it with our families
Aleksandra took a wedding herself last year: two families with four children between two and six in total, in one family's terraced house in Järfälla, while the parents were at a wedding dinner in Hagaparken. She had met all four children once before, over coffee two weeks earlier. On the evening she arrived at four, had dinner with the children, ran a short disco in the living room and put them to bed two by two: the little ones in the guest room, the older ones in the children's room with a book. By nine everyone was asleep. The parents each got a text and came home at midnight. The whole shift qualified for RUT, because it took place at home.
Would you like a nanny who comes on the same days every week and whom the children know? Book a free first meeting with the nanny at your home, and we will work out a quote for your hours.
Read more: Evening and overnight babysitting · A nanny at the weekend · RUT deduction for nannies and babysitters · Prices
Frequently asked questions
Does a babysitter at a wedding qualify for the RUT deduction?
Only if the childcare takes place in or near your home. If the nanny looks after the children at your home while you are at the party, RUT applies. If she looks after them at the venue or the hotel, it does not count as work in the home, and then it is the full price, 398 kr an hour for occasional bookings.
How many children can one nanny take at a wedding?
It depends entirely on the ages. One nanny can look after two or three preschool-age children in a room, but not ten. If there are many children at the party, you need several nannies and a separate room with things to do. We help you work it out.
Can we share a nanny with another family at the party?
Yes, it is common and often the smartest option. Two families who put the children in the same flat or hotel room share one nanny and the cost. The children should have met beforehand, and one of the families is the responsible customer.
How far in advance should we book?
As soon as you know the date. Weddings are often on Saturdays in June and August, which are the most sought-after weekends. A month is good, two is better. The nanny should also meet the children at least once beforehand.
What happens if the child does not want to be with the nanny?
That is why we want her to meet the child beforehand. On the day, she arrives before the child is tired, joins in for a while with you nearby, and then takes over. A child who has already seen her once rarely protests for more than a few minutes.