Everything you need for a children's birthday party at home, from the invitation three weeks before to the thank-you note the day after. With a timeline, a shopping list, a schedule that actually holds, and the mistakes that make adults cry more than the children.
There are two kinds of children's parties: the ones where the parents had fun, and the ones where the parents promise themselves never to do it again. The difference is rarely budget or imagination. It is planning, a schedule and enough adults. Here is the guide we wish we had had the first time.
Three weeks before: set the frame
- Day and time. Saturday or Sunday morning, 10 to 12 or 14 to 16. Morning parties are calmer, the children are fresh and not hungry in the wrong way.
- Number of guests. Your child's age plus one is a good rule of thumb. If you invite more, invite more adults.
- At home or out. Home is cheapest and the youngest are happiest there. A venue or an activity from age seven, when children want something big.
- Theme or not. A theme makes the invitation, the cake and the games easier to choose. But it is not necessary. Children under five do not care.
Two weeks before: the invitation
Send the invitation two weeks before, with an RSVP date one week before. Write the start and end times, the address, whether siblings may come along, whether parents are expected to stay, and a phone number. Add allergies and the question of whether any child does not eat something. A paper invitation in the pigeonhole at förskola (municipal preschool, from age one), or a message in the parents' group chat. Both work, what matters is the RSVP date.
One week before: buy what keeps
| Category | What | Tip |
|---|---|---|
| Food | Hot dogs, pizza, pancakes or tacos | Choose one dish. Children do not eat buffets. |
| Cake | One cake, or cupcakes with a candle in each | Cupcakes save you cutting and everyone gets the same. |
| Drinks | Squash and water | Fizzy drinks only from age ten, and preferably not even then. |
| Party bags | Small things, not sweets | Or skip the bags and let the treasure from the treasure hunt be what the children take home. |
| Decorations | Balloons, a garland, a tablecloth | Nobody under ten notices more than that. |
| Games | Fishing game, treasure hunt, craft materials | See our Party games for kids by age. |
The day before: prepare what you can
- Bake the cake or collect it. Put it in the fridge.
- Fill the party bags.
- Write the treasure hunt clues. Our Treasure hunt for a kids' party takes half an hour.
- Blow up the balloons. They last a night.
- Put away everything the children are not allowed to touch. Lock the bedroom door.
- Decide who does what: one greets at the door, one runs the games, one handles the kitchen.
The schedule for a two-hour party
| Time | What happens |
|---|---|
| 0 to 15 min | Guests arrive. A free activity is set out: drawing, building, bubbles. |
| 15 to 30 min | One group game that gathers everyone. The fishing game or the teddy toss. |
| 30 to 45 min | The wild game. Musical chairs, musical statues, balloon stomp. |
| 45 to 75 min | Food. Everyone sits down at the same time. Adults eat afterwards. |
| 75 to 90 min | Cake, singing, presents. Open the presents in a circle so everyone can see. |
| 90 to 110 min | The treasure hunt. The children are busy, you tidy up. |
| 110 to 120 min | Party bags by the door, pick-up, thanks for coming. |
The mistakes everyone makes once
- Too few adults. One adult per five children under six. One per eight from age seven. The nanny you already have is the easiest way to get one more.
- Presents straight away at the door. Paper everywhere and the guests have nothing to do. Collect the presents in a basket and open them in a circle at cake time.
- Games with one winner. Nine losers per game. Choose games where everyone is involved the whole time.
- Sweets before the food. Five minutes later four children are crying and three are standing on the table.
- Trying to fit everything in. Five games planned, three played, everyone happy. That is a successful party.
Parties in Stockholm outside the home
From age seven many children want a party at a venue: an indoor play centre, a swimming pool, a museum with a children's workshop, a bowling alley or a climbing wall. Book at least three weeks ahead, especially Saturdays in February and March when all of Stockholm seems to have a birthday at once. Expect to still need one adult per five children: the venue's staff run the activity, not the children.
The day after: the thank-you note
A photo from the party and two lines from your child in the parents' group chat. It takes five minutes and it is the last thing the guests remember of the party.
How we do it with our families
Many of our families book their regular nanny as the extra adult at the party. She knows the birthday child, knows which friends tend to end up in conflict, and can run the treasure hunt while you greet parents and cut the cake. The same hourly rate as usual, and RUT (the Swedish tax deduction for household services, taken off the invoice directly) applies.
Would you like an extra adult at the party whom the children already know? Book a free first meeting with the nanny in your home.
Read more: Party games for kids by age · Treasure hunt for a kids' party · 100 riddles for kids with answers, sorted by age · Prices
Frequently asked questions about children's parties
How many children should you invite to a birthday party?
An old rule of thumb is the child's age plus one. Four children at the fourth birthday, eight at the seventh. If you invite the whole förskola group you need three adults and a clear schedule.
How long should a children's party last?
Two hours is about right from age four. For three-year-olds an hour and a half is enough. Twelve-year-olds can manage three, but then ideally with an activity outside the home in the middle.
Do you have to invite the whole class?
No, but it is wise to invite all or none of a clearly defined group, such as all the girls in the class or everyone in the football team. A child who is the only one not invited remembers it for a long time.
What does a children's party at home cost?
Food, cake, party bags and a little decoration for ten children usually comes to a few hundred kronor up to a thousand. If you hire a venue or book an activity it quickly becomes several thousand.
Can you have a children's party without party bags?
Yes. Let the treasure from the treasure hunt be what the children take home, or do a craft they can take with them. No guest under ten misses a party bag if they have had fun.