Father's Day in Sweden (fars dag) is the second Sunday in November, and what children can make themselves is what gets appreciated: a handprint card from age two, a breakfast the child has laid out from five, a letter in their own spelling from seven and an outing the child has planned from nine. Ten ideas below, sorted by age, with the preparation done on Saturday so that the child does the actual thing on Sunday.
A Sunday in November in Stockholm is dark until eight and dark again by four. It is raining, someone in the family has a cold and Dad really only has one wish: to sleep until nine. That is a good setting for Father's Day. No big plans, just the children making something that is their own and a morning that moves at a slow pace. Here are ten things children do themselves, with an adult who prepares on Saturday.
Who can manage what
| Age | Does themselves | Needs help with | Takes |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 to 3 years | Handprints, carrying one thing, a hug | Everything else | 10 minutes |
| 3 to 5 years | Painting a card or a mug, laying out breakfast | Writing, cutting, the oven | 30 minutes |
| 6 to 8 years | Writing, baking from a recipe, laying the table, planning a walk | The hob, the oven, keeping track of time | 1 hour |
| 9 to 12 years | Everything, including planning a whole morning | Money for the bus, if needed | 1 to 2 hours |
Ten things children make themselves
- A handprint card. From age one. Paint on the hand, press, the adult writes the date. One card a year in a box becomes a series that Dad looks at when the child is twenty.
- A painted mug. From age three. Porcelain pens on a white mug, set according to the pen's instructions, often in the oven. The mug gets used every morning for years, which makes it the present that is seen the most.
- Breakfast in bed. From three with help, from six almost on their own. Toast, an egg if an adult boils it, coffee the child carries in with both hands. At nine, not six. Say so the night before.
- A portrait. From age three. The child paints Dad. Beard, glasses, a gigantic nose. Date on the back, on the fridge for a year.
- A coupon book. From age five. Slips of paper with things the child promises: fetch the newspaper, a shoulder massage, choose a film for Dad, be quiet one Saturday morning. The last one is rarely redeemed, but the slip is funny.
- Something baked. From age four with help. Kanelbullar (cinnamon buns) or a kladdkaka (sticky chocolate cake). The dough on Saturday, the oven on Sunday. Doughs that can take small hands are in Baking with kids.
- A letter. From age seven. Three things the child likes about Dad, written in their own spelling. Correct nothing. Dads keep letters like that in their wallets.
- A game the child has chosen. From age six. The child decides which game is played in the evening, sets it out and explains the rules. Dad plays without his phone. That is the whole present.
- A planned walk. From age eight. The child draws a map of a route around the neighbourhood, with a stop for fika or a playground, and leads the way. Dad follows and is not allowed to suggest shortcuts.
- An outing of their own. From nine or ten. The child plans a morning in Stockholm: which bus or metro, where to, what to do. A museum, a forest walk at Hellasgården, a swimming pool. Dad pays, the child decides. This is the present nine- to twelve-year-olds are proudest of.
Prepare on Saturday
Everything that needs an adult is done the day before: paper folded, paint poured out, dough made, porcelain pens set out with a mug. If it is Mum who prepares, she is the assistant on Sunday, not the lead. If it is a ten-year-old older sibling in charge: give them the responsibility for real, with a list, and let it go a bit wrong. The nanny can do the preparation on Friday if she is there then, so that the weekend belongs to the family. Tell the children on Saturday what is going to happen, so that Sunday does not start at six with a three-year-old who wants to paint.
What does not work
- Five things. A card and a breakfast is a whole Father's Day. More things mean more moments when Dad has to be grateful before coffee.
- Bought presents the child did not choose. Socks from Mum via the child are socks from Mum. If the child wants to buy something, go to the shop together and let the child choose with their own money.
- Doing something big outdoors in November. It is dark at four. An outing in the morning, home for lunch, a quiet afternoon.
- Dad planning his own Father's Day. It happens in many families, and then there is no Father's Day. Someone else takes it on: a partner, an older sibling, the nanny on Friday.
Father's Day when the family looks different
Children with two mums, children whose dad is not around or is not a good person in the child's life, children who are at their mum's that weekend. Father's Day can be given to the man the child loves: grandpa, an uncle, a stepdad, a friend's dad. Or not celebrated at all. A child who misses their dad that Sunday does not need a craft project, they need someone to say that it is okay to be sad. Preschools in Stockholm have often stopped doing Father's Day crafts for exactly that reason, and that is reasonable. Do it at home, for whoever is the right person in your family. If the child alternates between homes: a card sent along on Friday and a phone call on Sunday morning is plenty.
How we do it with our families
Doaa was with a family in Spånga on the Friday before Father's Day last year, with a three-year-old and an eight-year-old, and the mum had asked for help with the preparation. The eight-year-old painted a mug with a porcelain pen at the kitchen table at four o'clock and the three-year-old made a handprint card, while Doaa made a cinnamon bun dough and put it in the fridge. The eight-year-old also drew a map of a walk to the park with a stop at a bench where they would have fika. The note to the mum said: the mug goes in the oven as per the label on the pen, the dough is in the fridge, the map is in the eight-year-old's rucksack, and the three-year-old does not know it is a secret so let him tell.
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Read more: Mother's Day crafts · Crafts for kids · Baking with kids · FAQ
Frequently asked questions
When is Father's Day in Sweden?
The second Sunday in November, every year. It is a different date from many other countries, so do not go by a foreign calendar. It is dark, often rainy and in the middle of the autumn cold season, which makes it a good day to stay at home and do something simple.
What can a two-year-old do for Father's Day?
A handprint on a card, carry one thing in for breakfast and give a hug. The rest is done by the other parent, an older sibling or the nanny the day before. A two-year-old does not need to do more than that, and Dad does not want more than that.
Does it have to be a craft?
No. A walk the child has planned, a breakfast the child has laid out or an evening with a game the child has chosen is just as much Father's Day. Crafts suit children under seven. From age eight it is often more fun to do something together.
What do you do when there is no dad, or when there are two mums?
Give the day to someone else who matters: grandpa, an uncle, a stepdad. Or let it pass. Father's Day is not an obligation, and a child who misses their dad that day needs a conversation more than a present.
Do you need to buy anything?
No. What is appreciated is what the child has made or chosen themselves. A bought present the child did not help choose is in practice from the other parent, and Dad notices.