Pocket money works from about the age of six, when a child can count and understands that money runs out. Weekly pocket money suits younger children, a monthly allowance suits children from ten to twelve. The point is not the amount but letting your child decide for themselves, get it wrong for small sums and learn to wait. And pocket money should not be payment for chores.
A seven-year-old is standing in the kiosk by Mariatorget on a Saturday with thirty kronor in one hand and a packet of trading cards in the other. The cards cost forty. He already spent the rest on sweets on Thursday. It is a small catastrophe, and it is exactly the kind of catastrophe that is the whole point of pocket money. That he gets to experience it now, with thirty kronor, rather than in fifteen years with a credit card, is the best argument for introducing it. Here is how to do it in a way that teaches him something.
When is a child ready?
Children under five get little out of having their own money. They understand that you swap a coin for an ice cream, but not that the coin is then gone, and not that ten one-krona coins are the same as one ten-krona coin. Around six, roughly when children start förskoleklass (the preschool year before school), several pieces fall into place: counting to a hundred, understanding that a week has seven days, and wanting things that cost money. That is when pocket money starts to mean something. One sign is when your child starts asking what things cost, or nagging to buy something on their own.
| Age | Setup | What the child is practising |
|---|---|---|
| 4 to 5 years | Coins to play with, buying one thing in the shop with their own money now and then | That money is exchanged for things and is then gone |
| 6 to 8 years | Weekly pocket money, in cash, same day every week | Waiting until Saturday, choosing between two things, saving for two weeks |
| 9 to 11 years | Weekly or fortnightly pocket money, ideally with their own account alongside | Planning, saving for something bigger, keeping track of a card |
| 12 years and up | Monthly allowance, often with responsibility for certain purchases such as clothes or the SL card (Stockholm's public transport pass) | Budgeting over a month, and that money that is gone is gone |
How much?
There is no right amount, but there is a way of thinking about it. Pocket money should be enough for your child to buy something small on their own, and to save up for something that feels big in three or four weeks. It should not be enough for everything, because then the choice disappears, and the choice is what your child is meant to practise. The banks regularly survey what Swedish children get at different ages; the levels shift over the years, so look up current figures if you want a reference point. More important than the amount is that it arrives the same day every week, without your child having to nag, and without you changing it depending on your mood.
Decide in advance what your child is expected to pay for. For a seven-year-old that might be sweets and trading cards. For a twelve-year-old it could be clothes beyond the basics, the cinema with friends and a mobile subscription. The clearer it is, the fewer arguments at the till.
Should pocket money be payment for chores?
Many parents tie the money to emptying the dishwasher or making the bed. We think that is a mistake, and we see in our families how it plays out. Chores are something you do because you live together; that is how a home works. Money is something you get in order to practise handling money. Mix the two and you get a child who asks what they will get for tidying up, and who one day works out that they would rather forgo the money than empty the dishwasher. Then you have lost both the chore and the lesson.
That does not mean children should never earn money. Real extra jobs, beyond the everyday, can happily be paid: washing the car, weeding the flower bed, helping the neighbour with leaves. That teaches something different, namely that work can be exchanged for money, and that is good too. But pocket money is not a wage.
What your child learns, if you let them
- To wait. Not buying the first thing they see on Thursday so they can buy what they really want on Saturday. It is the same ability that is later called impulse control.
- To go without. Two things, money for one. It is uncomfortable at seven and at forty. Practice helps.
- That money runs out. Thirty kronor in your hand disappears in a different way from a number in an app. That is why cash comes first.
- To save. A jar with a goal on it: "The Lego costs 300, I have 180." Draw a scale. Your child watches it grow.
- To regret. The bad toy that broke within a day is a better teacher than you will ever be.
Rules that make it work
- Same day, same amount. Saturday morning, just in time for the kiosk. Raise it once a year, ideally on their birthday.
- No advances. Gone is gone. That is the whole point, and it is the hardest rule to stick to.
- Never withhold the money as punishment. Then it becomes a tool of power, and your child learns nothing about money, only about you.
- Do not interfere with the purchases. Within your limits, it is your child's money. You are allowed an opinion, silently.
- Talk about money. What the milk costs, why you compare prices, that you also go without things. Children who hear adults reason about money learn more than from any pocket money.
Swish, cards and money you cannot see
From about the age of ten many children want a card, and most banks offer children's accounts with cards that parents control. That works well, with one caveat: numbers on a screen do not feel like money. A child who has never had cash finds it harder to grasp that fifty kronor is gone once it is gone. We recommend starting with cash for a few years, moving to a card when your child asks for one, and having a transition period with both. Go through the app together on Sundays: what did it go on, what is left. Not as a check but as an exercise in arithmetic.
Children who get too much, and children who get too little
A child who gets everything they ask for, outside the pocket money, does not really have pocket money, just a bonus. Then they learn nothing, because there is nothing to go without. It is a common mistake in families where time is scarce: it is easier to buy than to say no in the shop. The reverse, a child who never gets any money of their own, does not learn anything either, because they never get to practise. Both children arrive at adult life without ever having failed with money on a small scale. Better to have done that at seven.
How we do it with our families
Esther has a nine-year-old in Östermalm who gets his pocket money on Fridays, the day she picks him up. They walk past the kiosk on the way home. The first month, all of it went on the Friday. Esther said nothing about it, but she started asking on Thursdays what he was planning to buy, and wrote it on a note in the hallway. In week five he left the money untouched because he wanted a game that cost three weeks' worth. She put that on the note to his parents, because that was the news. Having the same nanny every Friday means she sees what he decided last week and can remind him, without deciding for him.
Would you like a nanny who comes on the same days every week and whom the children know? Book a free first meeting with the nanny in your home, and we will work out a quote for your hours.
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Frequently asked questions
When should children start getting pocket money?
Around six works for most: the child can count, understands that money runs out and has started wanting to buy things on their own. Younger children can have coins to play shop with, but pocket money in the proper sense does not give much until a child can plan a few days ahead.
How much pocket money should a child get?
Enough for the child to buy something small on their own each week and save for something bigger over a month, but not so much that they never have to go without. The banks publish regular surveys of what Swedish children get; the levels change, so check current figures. The amount matters less than it being regular.
Should pocket money be tied to chores?
We think not. Chores are done because you are part of the family, and money is given so you learn to handle money. Mix the two and you get a child who negotiates over every emptied dishwasher. Extra jobs beyond the usual, like washing the car, can on the other hand happily be paid.
Should I interfere with what my child buys?
No, within the limits you set in advance: no sweets on weekdays, nothing that goes against the family's rules. The rest is the child's. A child who gets to buy a bad toy with the whole week's money and regret it learns more than a child who is told no.
Pocket money in cash or on a card?
Start with cash so your child sees the money shrink in their hand. A card or an app with a children's account works from about ten, when the child understands that the number on the screen is real money that runs out. Many families use both during a transition period of a year or so.