The utvecklingssamtal (the parent-teacher meeting about your child's development) is the preschool's and the parents' joint review of how the child is settling in and developing, and it must be held at least once a year. It usually takes half an hour, it is not a grading session, and the best thing you can do is turn up with three questions and one thing you want to share yourselves.
Most parents go to their first utvecklingssamtal with a vague worry: are they going to say something is wrong? The answer is almost always no. The meeting is about you and the förskola (municipal preschool, from age one) seeing the same child. Here is how to prepare so that the half hour gets used.
Wednesday, quarter past four, in a staff room at a förskola in Bromma. Two parents who have taken an hour off work, a preschool teacher with a folder and a four-year-old who shows off a drawing of a horse and then goes out to play. Twenty minutes later the parents have learned that she mostly plays with two particular children, that she never sleeps at rest time and that she can count to twenty in English, which nobody at home knew. That is a good utvecklingssamtal.
What the law says
The Swedish Education Act says that the förskola must hold an utvecklingssamtal with the child's guardians at least once a year, about the child's development and learning. The preschool teacher is responsible for the meeting, and it should be based on what the förskola has documented during the year. The national curriculum adds that the meeting should be a collaboration: you know what your child is like at home, the förskola knows what your child is like in a group, and neither of you sees the whole picture alone.
What the meeting covers
| Part | What the förskola brings up |
|---|---|
| Wellbeing | How the child is doing, plays, finds friends, handles drop-off and pick-up |
| Daily routines | Food, rest, nappies or the toilet, clothes, time outdoors |
| Language | Vocabulary, conversation, interest in books, mother tongue |
| Play and learning | What the child enjoys, how they play with others, what they explore |
| Documentation | Photos, drawings, quotes from the child, sometimes a portfolio |
| The child's own voice | What the child says about förskola themselves |
Ten questions to ask
- Who does my child play with, and what does the play look like?
- How does drop-off go once we have left?
- What does my child do when they are sad?
- How does my child eat and sleep here, compared with at home?
- Is there anything my child avoids?
- How are you working with language right now?
- What is my child good at that we might not see at home?
- Is there anything you would like us to do at home?
- What does the next six months look like for the group?
- What do we do if something changes before the next meeting?
Do not bring all ten. Pick three you genuinely want answered, and write them down. Half an hour goes quickly, and the questions asked first get the best answers.
Before, during and after
| When | What you do |
|---|---|
| The week before | Talk to your child about förskola: what is most fun, who do you play with, is anything hard. Write down what your child says |
| The day before | Choose your three questions. Decide which of you takes which. Tell your child you are meeting their teacher tomorrow |
| During the meeting | Listen first, ask afterwards. Ask for examples when something is vague. Write down one thing to do at home |
| The same evening | Tell your child the nice things the teacher said. They want to know |
| The week after | Do what you said you would do. Mention at drop-off that you have done it |
Prepare your child
Tell your child the day before that you are going to talk to their teacher about how things are at förskola, and ask what they want you to say. Often something unexpected comes up: that they always get the broken bike, that a friend has left. Bring it with you. And afterwards, tell them the nice things the teacher said; your child wants to know.
The child in the room: how it works by age
A one-year-old attends the meeting as a body on a lap and nothing more. A three-year-old can show a drawing or a picture from their folder, hear the teacher say something kind, and then go out. A four- or five-year-old can answer questions of their own: what do you like most here, what is boring, who do you play with. Many förskolor let the child join for the first ten minutes and then carry on without them, so that you can talk about what the child should not hear. If you would rather talk entirely without your child, say so when the time is booked.
What you should share yourselves
- Changes at home: a sibling, a move, a separation, a new nanny.
- How your child talks about förskola at home.
- What your child is afraid of or finds difficult.
- Whether someone else does pick-up regularly, and who.
- What the nights are like. A child who has slept badly for a month behaves differently at förskola, and the staff cannot know why.
If the förskola raises something worrying
Sometimes the förskola says something you did not expect: that your child is struggling with language, avoids other children or has outbursts the staff cannot see the end of. The first thing to do is listen to the end and ask for examples. The second is to ask what the förskola intends to do. They have a special needs teacher they can bring in, and they can map out how your child functions over the day. The third is to set a date for a follow-up, within a few weeks, not next year. And take it to BVC (the child health clinic every family is enrolled in) if it concerns language or development; they see your child from a different angle. A worry taken seriously at three is almost always easier to do something about than the same worry at six.
Two parents who do not live together
Both guardians have the right to attend the utvecklingssamtal, and the förskola cannot leave one of you out. If sitting in the same room is not possible, ask for two meetings. It is extra work for the förskola, but it is your right, and it is better than a meeting where nobody says what they think. Also let them know if your child alternates between two homes, so that the förskola knows which week is whose when they describe how your child is doing.
How we do it with our families
When a family has one of our nannies doing pick-up regularly, we usually suggest that the nanny is properly introduced to the staff, and that the parents bring her observations to the utvecklingssamtal. She sees the child every Tuesday at four, in the transition between förskola and home, and that is a time of day neither the staff nor the parents see. Sanna writes three lines on the note every time: how pick-up went, what the child said about their day and whether anything stood out. Before the autumn meeting with a family in Bromma, the mother copied three weeks of notes onto a single page, and the preschool teacher said it was the most useful thing a parent had ever brought.
Would you like a nanny who comes the same days every week and whom the children know? Book a free first meeting with the nanny in your own home, and we will work out a quote for your hours.
Read more: Settling in at förskola · The Swedish preschool curriculum, explained for parents · The Convention on the Rights of the Child in Swedish preschool · FAQ
Frequently asked questions
How often are parent-teacher meetings held at förskola?
At least once a year under the Education Act. Many förskolor hold one in the autumn and one in the spring, and always a follow-up meeting a few weeks after the settling-in period. If you want an extra meeting, because something has changed at home or because you are worried, you have the right to ask for one. Mention it at drop-off or write to the head of the preschool.
What do you talk about?
How your child is settling in, playing, talking and managing daily life: meals, rest, friends, language. The förskola often shows documentation such as photos, drawings and the child's own words. It is not a grading session, and the förskola should not compare your child with others. It should describe what your child does and how they support the next step.
Should the child be there?
Often yes, for part of the meeting. The UN Convention on the Rights of the Child and the curriculum say the child's voice should be included. How much depends on age: a three-year-old can show a drawing and go out to play, a five-year-old can say for herself what she likes at förskola and what she does not. Ask the förskola how they usually do it, and say so if you would rather talk without your child.
Can we raise problems?
Yes, that is the point. Worries about language, about friendships, about your child not wanting to go. Raise them early, at drop-off rather than waiting six months for the meeting. If it is something bigger, ask for a separate meeting with the preschool teacher and the head, so that it is not squeezed into the last five minutes of an utvecklingssamtal.
What happens if the förskola says they are worried?
Listen to the end, ask questions and ask for concrete examples. Ask what the förskola intends to do and when you will follow up. It is often about language or social interaction, and the förskola has a special needs teacher to bring in. You can also talk to BVC. A worry raised at the age of three is almost always easier to do something about than the same worry at six.